The phone call...

Everything was amazing the first day into our relationship. We began to see how well we fit together and how we both complemented each other. We talked about why we liked each other and what we had to look forward to together. She kept reminding me that the first 6 months are “Honeymooning” months and that its always blissful in that time. No fighting, no dilemmas, no arguments; it all comes *after the six months*. Unfortunately, this wasn’t the case. Now, I knew Vanessa and her Ex were still on talking terms while we weren’t together. We’d often talked on MSN in group convos and what not, and Vanessa told me that he called her often to talk and sent her text messages. To be really honest; I never liked it. I always saw it as a threat that I would have to watch carefully and make sure it didn’t come back.

Kind of like how you have to watch and tender your flowers in the garden in case a weed grabs hold of them and chokes the life from it.

I know it’s a terrible thing to think, because I do trust Vanessa – I do with all my heart, but back then it was like a romance movie where the good guy tells the girl that he likes her just in time to see the ex boyfriend come back out of the woodwork and steal her away. To have all that heart and soul put onto the table, only to be handed back your broken heart in a thousand pieces. I knew her ex still hadn’t let go of her yet: everyone did. And I’m pretty sure Vanessa did too. Personally, I always think its best to move on from a finished relationship when it has gotten to a certain level. Being near each other would only mean getting back together with them, because you think back to what it was like with them; and if you’re currently in a relationship going through hard times it would seem like a better option… I was just hoping that day would never come.

We were sitting on Vanessa’s couch in her apartment, just quietly watching TV together. It was so peaceful that night… the tingling sensations from her touch were still there... every brush or hug brought sparks. Our relationship was blooming as well as I could hope.

Then the call came.

She answered it and came back into the living room with the cordless phone. She sat down and was just chatting on the phone about current events and what the other person on the other side of the line was doing. All I could here were the mumblings of a voice… a male voice. I thought it was her brother or her dad ( I had never heard their voices before). She took a second to put her hand over the mouthpiece and mouthed his name to me. I knew then, that something was going to happen; but I had no idea to what extent his jealous rage would go. Vanessa was still just talking to him now, and I wanted it to end. This guy was still after her and I wouldn’t have any of it. I wouldn’t let him come back into Vanessa’s life and push me out in the process. Stories of “ex boyfriends” still in the picture never end well… they cause dramas and jealousy and suspicions to arise. Accusations of mistrust and deception come about when the girlfriend starts seeing the ex boyfriend, and usually – things happen like getting back together. This was my main fear. But I listened intently to what Vanessa was saying on the phone.

“Ray and I got together”, she said at last, unable to beat around the bush any longer.

It’s pretty crazy how those five words changed the beginning of our relationship forever.

Her ex hung up the phone and I knew it wasn’t going to be the end of it. This was necessary though, it had to be done for everyone’s sake. He had to stop talking to Vanessa like he was still her boyfriend and realize that they weren’t, nor ever will be together again. I just sat there and said a few comforting words like “It was the truth.” And “he had to find out some time.”

When I said I knew it wasn’t going to be the end of it, I really wasn’t expecting the phone call less than five minutes later. She picked up the phone and I heard him talking in a very furious and angry tone. I kept telling Vanessa to hang up, to put the phone down. All he needed was time to get in touch with the reality he had been running away from for so long. But stubborn as she is, she refused and sat through the abuse. I offered to take the phone from her, even softly wrestled the phone from her hand but she would have none of it. I guess in hindsight it was for the best. I think if I answered the phone I would have told him to *insert string of expletives here*. It was best that she explained to him that she had no feelings for him anymore and that she was ready to move on. Vanessa hung up the phone and she was quiet for a long time, just staring down at the floor. She told me everything that her ex had said to her on the phone, leaving out very little detail.

She thought it incredible that I stayed by her and wasn’t phased by what had just taken place. She was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to take this stress and stand by her in this time of need, just after we had gotten together. I didn’t once think of leaving. I knew where my place was and what my heart was telling me to do. She thought that because I didn’t expect any of this to happen in such a new relationship, that I would run away and leaver her on her own.

She was wrong. Forever so.

She underestimated how much I cared for her already, how willing I was to sacrifice anything I owned or had to make her happy. I told her that I would never leave her side. That I would always try and be there for her when she needed me.

We held each other for a long time, talking into the night, and fell asleep in each others arms.